A Remarkable Russian

Apr 16

Anonymous asked: Oooh thought Ellie was the only one? Hmmm... Aha! Stanislav, you will be dressed as EARRING MAGIC KEN for 24 hours. Mun has Google. BTW, this Ken was the most popular Ken ever sold. Until Mattel found out what demographic was buying these Kens.

…Nyet.

remarkablerussian asked: Draws a penis on her door.

administration-co:

remarkablerussian:

administration-co:

Nothing says good morning like a genitals on a door. 

"How mature- an unoriginal." Mama sighed. Looks like she was going to have to get a janitor up here to scrub the door.

"Vhat? I am releasing emotions into beautiful art! Is not my fault you are against emotional expression."

"That’s right I am terrible- shame on me for discriminating against art." She mused with an idle tone. "Have fun drawing on walls Sir. I’m sure the kinder gardener in you is squealing with delight."

"If you can’t I can draw vagina instead. I am not sexist spy!" He laughs darkly before getting to work on said picture.

caribousoldier:

remarkablerussian:

 

"Nyet, I don’t like to eat, ees very… Boring, cannot taste anything." He replied a shake of his head. "If you do not mind smoking, I vill join you vhile you eat cake."

She took a back of cigarettes from her pocket and a lighter from her clevage “I’m doing both” she smiled ditching the marker. “I never got your name ” she asked as they went down the way to the kitchen.

"Eet ees Stanislav Vikentieva, Russian spy, but you can tell by now, da?" He replied, walking alongside her as he pulled out his own cigarette case.

(via caribousoldier-deactivated20140)

remarkablerussian asked: Draws a penis on her door.

administration-co:

Nothing says good morning like a genitals on a door. 

"How mature- an unoriginal." Mama sighed. Looks like she was going to have to get a janitor up here to scrub the door.

"Vhat? I am releasing emotions into beautiful art! Is not my fault you are against emotional expression."

Apr 15

caribousoldier:

remarkablerussian:

Draws a penis on a wall.

 

"Nyet, I have drank too many caffeinated drinks, if I have any more my eyes vill be darker." He replied with a shake of his head. "And… I have seen many penises too but I do not memorize all details of it, you know."

Tessa sighed and smiled. “Well I just finished baking some cake, welcome to have some” she looked at the memeber. “Just seams to stick in my mind” it was a damn good one. “Probably not as much as me”

"Nyet, I don’t like to eat, ees very… Boring, cannot taste anything." He replied a shake of his head. "If you do not mind smoking, I vill join you vhile you eat cake."

(via caribousoldier-deactivated20140)

Draws a penis on a wall. -

remarkablerussian:

caribousoldier:

remarkablerussian:

caribousoldier:

Flings a hairtie at him. “You ain’t doing it right”

"I am sorry picture does not meet up to penis of caribou. You vant to try?" He asked, handing the other a marker.

She takes the marker and makes it…

"Nyet, I have drank too many caffeinated drinks, if I have any more my eyes vill be darker." He replied with a shake of his head. "And… I have seen many penises too but I do not memorize all details of it, you know."

(via caribousoldier-deactivated20140)

Draws a penis on a wall.

caribousoldier:

remarkablerussian:

caribousoldier:

Flings a hairtie at him. “You ain’t doing it right”

"I am sorry picture does not meet up to penis of caribou. You vant to try?" He asked, handing the other a marker.

She takes the marker and makes it bigger with shading and more detail. “I’ve seen to many in my life” she gives a half smile at the spy “Where you been?”

"Making joke about you is simply too easy." He replied, looking at the detailed genitalia. "But I have been in mourning, but I feel better now. Vell, not better, just not so in pain."

(via caribousoldier-deactivated20140)

[video]

Draws a penis on a wall.

theotherubersheep:

"Very classy, Stani."

"Vhat? I am letting out pent up emotions. Cannot bottle up my thoughts."

(Source: remarkablerussian)

Draws a penis on a wall.

caribousoldier:

Flings a hairtie at him. “You ain’t doing it right”

"I am sorry picture does not meet up to penis of caribou. You vant to try?" He asked, handing the other a marker.

(Source: remarkablerussian, via caribousoldier-deactivated20140)

Draws a penis on a wall.

Apr 03

askdascout:

remarkablerussian:

"Da, but if your insults resemble appearance, I know there ees not much to offer."

"Is there a reason for you to be jabbing at me like this? I don’t even know who the hell you are."

"Ah, but this is how I meet people! And am I not just a charming spy? I am Stanislav Vikentieva, if you do so care to know."

askdascout:

remarkablerussian:

"Every time you open mouth, da."

"Yeah, that makes a lot of sense… If that’s the rule, does that mean I can just comment on whatever you say?”

"Da, but if your insults resemble appearance, I know there ees not much to offer."

Was going to make April fool’s joke.

Say thing like, ‘I love you all and think you are all special!’

But I could not stop dry heaving at thought.

askdascout:

remarkablerussian:

askdascout:

"Been hearing a lot about people getting engaged lately…"

"Is too bad none of it involves you!"

Oops.

"Hmph. Did I ask for your commentary?"

"Every time time you open mouth, da."